There is a lot of discussion on social media about body positivity. I love it. Or, some of it. I love that there is more emphasis on women loving their bodies regardless of their weight or the size of the pants they wear. I love that there is a movement on allowing women to believe they are beautiful even if they don’t have a barbie doll physique. After all…isn’t that totally unattainable for most of us? I love that there are all different kinds of body shapes and sizes getting attention and admiration. These are all really positive. After all, I want my little girl to grow up with all different kinds of role models to choose from. All I had was Cindy Crawford and Kate Moss…none of which I looked like. She may or may not have the same build as me so I can only be a physical role model in certain ways. Behaviour and work ethic included.
So what do I see as the downside to this? Well…I want women to be healthy. I want to help educate women on healthy nutrition, a healthy relationship with food, a healthy relationship with their bodies, and healthy movement. I don’t want the term “weight loss” to be a negative. Some people NEED to lose weight for their health. It is not healthy to be 100lbs overweight. Or 50lb. Think of the stress on your bones, joints, heart, lungs..it’s certainly not optimal. The goal is to be able to achieve a healthy weight WHILE still loving on yourself. No self loathing allowed.
Now, that being said, if someone has an extra 5-10lbs to lose…should we assume that she hates her body, hates herself, and won’t be happy until that weight is gone? The answer is a resounding no. Just like if you are happy with some extra weight, she’s allowed to want to lose the extra weight. TO EACH THEIR OWN.
Being happy where you are does not equal not giving a shit about your health. Eat the cookie..but not every day and not 40 of them. Do a workout, go for a run, but don’t use exercise as a means to correct your diet or as a form of punishment. Being the best and healthiest version of yourself doesn’t have look the same as anyone else. It means finding the balance of being healthy and feeling really good. It means eating foods that nourish and sustain your body while providing the energy required to live. It means cutting out the toxic shit that brings you down emotionally and physically. Letting go of old stories in your head and learning new and sustainable habits. It means being strong enough to carry your kids and 3 bags of groceries. It means building strength now so that when you are 75 you can climb the stairs, play with your grandchildren, travel with your spouse. It means so many things to each of us.
You don’t have to be a specific size, a specific body composition, or have a specific look. You can be the healthiest version of YOU by figuring out what your values in life are. Using those things that really matter to you, both long term and short term, can help you design what looks right for you.
My personal experience was that my weight, or more specifically, how I felt inside my skin, was preventing me from enjoying other aspects of my life. I started out by thinking that it was a particular number on the scale I wanted to see and gradually that shifted to a feeling…and the number on the scale became irrelevant to a certain degree. When I started feeling good, strong, healthy, that’s when other areas of my life came into focus and I was able to discard the parts that weren’t working and create a new world for myself. Buried under that ‘weight’ (not feeling good about myself) were a whole slew of things that desperately needed time and attention. I was masking a lot of things with my poor habits and my not-so-great health. I didn’t know that at the time, of course, but I can see it very clearly now. Making changes to your body is WAY MORE than just a physical change and THAT right there is why I don’t ever want a negative connotation with the term weight loss. I only lost about 5-7 pounds at the end of it but I shed about 100lbs of emotional baggage on the journey. And still am. There are layers upon layers. Shedding the fat has helped me in so many ways and I can honestly say the size of my jeans can’t compare to the much more important things that have changed. Feeling good in my skin is freedom. Learning what my body is capable of is exhilarating. Pushing beyond my comfort zone is empowering.
Whatever your goals are…even if it is wanting to be in a size 2 jean…own it and work for it. Don’t ever let others tell you that what you want for yourself isn’t okay. You are allowed to want what you want and if you are willing to do the work that it takes..then go for it. Be realistic. Know what you are willing to give up to get those abs and be aware of what you aren’t willing to sacrifice. Figure out your true core values, what you want right now and what you want in the future, and make a plan. A certified nutrition coach and personal trainer can help you with these things so reach out and ask for some help if you need it! You aren’t expected to know how to do everything on your own ❤